Coaching in Context is a Team Effort

By Bill and Linda Tiffan

Effective coaching never takes place in a vacuum; it always takes place in the context of an organization and its culture, and that context requires active participation by the people who can offer the individual who is being coached feedback, encouragement and support.

Typically, participants include the individual’s boss, colleagues and direct reports. Some of our most effective coaching assignments were successful because the boss took an active role in the process. And some of the least effective sessions have been those where the boss played only a limited role.

In one case, we were asked to work with an executive whose interpersonal style was creating a lot of friction within an organization; part of the problem was his boss, a passive manager who avoided confrontation at all costs. In this case, the context required that we eventually work with the boss to help him become a more active manager, which, in turn, helped our initial client.

In the movie “A Few Good Men,” Tom Cruise, who plays a military prosecutor, asks witness Jack Nicholson, a Marine general, if his instructions to his troops were clear. “Crystal,” is Nicholson’s brusque reply. The same holds true for expectations for coaching: they should be crystal clear.

When we were working with the company in the previous example, we had a meeting with the manager’s boss and their chief executive to review the goals of our assignment. We asked, “How serious is this situation? Suppose the individual doesn’t improve?” The CEO said that if the manager didn’t shape up, he wouldn’t have a future with the company.

After that meeting, the boss became noticeably more assertive in his management style. The expectations were made crystal clear. And once again, the context of the situation called for an additional participant, the CEO in this case, to have a role.

Coaches also recognize the importance of “EQ” over “IQ,” a significant cultural issue in most companies. We once were asked to assess and counsel a hard-driving executive, a man with a national reputation in his industry as a successful, but tough, negotiator. The problem was, he treated his direct reports and colleagues with the same steely demeanor that he used with vendors.

While this executive had great functional intelligence that resulted in significant savings for his employer, he had a very low “emotional quotient.” He paid little attention to others’ feelings and was unaware of the adverse impact he was having on the organization. He shrugged off any attempts to change his behavior within the company. “My financial results speak for themselves,” was his motto. Apparently, they did not speak loudly enough, for within a few months he was gone. The culture simply would not tolerate his behavior.

Whatever the individual’s opportunities for growth or improvement, they’re not in isolation from the rest of the people or the culture of the company. Coaches need to approach these opportunities in the context of the organization and use that context to help the individual. When coaching becomes a team effort, it also becomes more effective.

Based in Atlanta, Bill and Linda Tiffan are members of WJM Associates’ executive coaching and assessment faculty.

back to top

Networking Effectively
In Today’s Environment

Networking to advance your career is a practice that is built upon nuances. Make too many calls to a prospective contact and you may wear out your welcome; make too few, and you might miss out on an opportunity.

In his career as an advisor to corporate managers, Enrique Garcia, a member of WJM Associates’ executive coaching and assessment faculty, has observed successful and unsuccessful approaches to networking. Here are some excerpts from a recent discussion on the subject with WJManagement Advisor.

How should someone approach networking?

When you call people to network, you’re requesting a favor -- to grant you a few minutes of their time and to share one or more of their business contacts with you. That’s asking a lot, so your tone should express gratitude and appreciation.

What should you say when you call?

If you’re lucky enough to get the person on the line, thank him or her and introduce yourself using your common friend. “John gave me your name and thought you might have some points for me. I’m looking for a position [in a certain field or company, at a certain level, etc.].” After making this brief introduction, ask if this is a good time to speak -- it shows your concern for the person’s schedule -- and offer to call back if necessary. I wouldn’t put any pressure on the people you call because they really don’t have to do anything for you. Just be polite and direct. “Any suggestions you have would be welcome.” Listen actively to what people have to say and take notes. End the conversation by thanking them for their time. You may even want to send a short, handwritten note, if that’s your style.

What about offering to meet for coffee or lunch?

I would avoid that. Some people may feel obligated to meet or guilty if they can’t.

What happens if you reach someone’s voice mail?

Well, it’s best not to leave a message if you don’t have to. Try calling early, before 8:30 in the morning, and just before or after lunch. End of day is not a good time for people rushing to catch the train.

If you have to leave a voice mail message, be brief, be polite and be upbeat. You don’t want to sound frustrated or discouraged at not being able to connect. Leave a short message, “Hi, this is Enrique. I’m a friend of John’s. I’m looking for a certain type of position and John thought you might have some points for me. Here’s my phone number. I hope to hear from you soon.”

Unfortunately, people don’t always call back. They may be traveling, on vacation or just too busy. They might accidentally delete your voice mail message and have no way of reaching you. So if you don’t hear anything for a few days, call back again and leave a follow-up message -- short, polite and to the point. If someone does not respond after two or three calls, leave it alone for a while. That’s an answer in itself -- “I’m busy,” “I’ve got other priorities right now,” or even “I’m not interested.”

What about using e-mail?

That’s another good tool. Many of us are glued to our computers these days. E-mail gives people the option of responding at their convenience. “I tried reaching you a few days ago … I know you are busy … John thinks highly of your opinions … would you have a few minutes to speak … what would be a good date and time for me to call?” If people don’t respond after a couple of e-mail attempts, leave it alone for a while, then try again by phone.

People often hold their best positions for referrals from their friends and colleagues. Knowing how to network effectively in this age of voice mail and e-mail can increase your chances of advancing your career.

back to top

Your Career Path to Success

Keys for Managing
Difficult Personalities

By Bill Morin
Chairman and CEO
WJM Associates

Recognizing different personality types and learning to deal with the issues they present is a skill that managers must develop and refine throughout their careers.

One of the most challenging types of employees to manage is the “angry” person. This is someone who infects people with negativity. Sometimes these people are so vocal and forceful that they silence the majority who don't share the same views. They are so loud it appears that everyone feels the same way. They can be sarcastic, critical, short-fused, impatient, and insensitive to the feelings of others.

People who are often belligerent at work are usually angry about something other than work. Their emotions are misplaced. The likelihood is that they are angry about something in their personal life and are venting that anger at work. They have little or no self awareness and understanding. Here are some guidelines for dealing with them:

* Don't return their anger with anger. Stay centered.
* Mirror what you think, see, and feel.
* Ask them why they are so angry.
* Help them see that the intensity of their reactions is not appropriate to the event. (Be careful on this one. Don't tell them they shouldn't feel a certain way.)
* Set strong boundaries with them. Do not let them be abusive.
* Help them realize they are not helping themselves by staying angry all the time.
* Encourage them to get help if you think it is needed.

Social Gossips

Social gossips often spend more time feeding the grapevine than working. They seem to have a hotline to what's going on in the company. Sometimes their information is amazingly on target; other times, it is filled with rumors and innuendos. In any event, social gossips waste a lot of their own time as well others’. Their trademarks? They are extremely social, often hang out in other people's offices, and spend a great deal of time on the telephone.

Social gossips are getting something from their behavior. There is a payback. It often has to do with a person's need to feel important and in the know. It gives them a feeling of power and control. Social gossips do a lot of implied bartering: "I'll be your friend if you tell me this information and vice versa." When people share gossip, they often share a false sense of connectedness with one another. They bond for the moment over the juicy piece of information they have about someone else. This is a tough behavior to confront because it is almost always done in secrecy. Here are some suggestions for dealing with social gossips:

* If you see them on the telephone a lot or spending a lot of time in other people's offices, ask them if they are bored and need more work.
* Keep them so busy and challenged that they have little time for gossip.
* If you are passing through their work area and you feel they are gossiping, find some reason to interrupt them. Subtly let them know that you know what they are doing.
* If you know for a fact that they have either told confidential information to others or spread hurtful rumors, confront them directly.

The Overly Sensitive, Conscientious Person

You wouldn’t think it, but people who are overly sensitive and conscientious also present management challenges. Sometimes they are difficult to deal with because their extreme sensitivity keeps them from hearing what you are trying to say. They often read into things that simply aren't there. Such people often are very thin skinned, have a high need for approval, are unusually self-critical, can be very defensive and emotional, and focus on pleasing others.

Overly sensitive people tend to be perfectionists. Their need for perfection usually stems from some insecurity. From their perspective, they are either a supreme success or a total failure. Here are some methods for dealing with this type of person:

* Give them plenty of recognition and praise.
* When giving them constructive criticism, tell them what you are not saying. In other words, frame the criticism with plenty of positives.
* If they get defensive, ask them why they feel the need to do so.
* Don't withhold constructive criticism from them because of their sensitivity.
* If they cry or get emotional at the slightest criticism, encourage them to look at that tendency.

Learning to “read” people’s personalities and deal with them as individuals is a skill that takes time to develop, but one that all good managers should have.

back to top

                                            *  *  *

WJM Associates offers a wide range of services designed to help organizations recruit, hire and develop top performers. To learn how we can help you, visit www.wjmassoc.com or contact Vice President Cynthia Auman at 212-972-7400 or cauman@wjmassoc.com.

WJM Associates, Inc.
675 Third Avenue, Suite 1610
New York, N.Y. 10017
Phone: 212-972-7400
Fax: 212-972-0695
www.wjmassoc.com

Enhancing Executive and Organizational Effectiveness